A Life's Pursuit: July 2006

Monday, July 31, 2006

Sleep is for dreamers....


Where do we go...which side is real?





I watched this thing on 'sleep' on Dateline that was very interesting. There were incidents on people who did things while sleep that they had no idea about when awake; even sleepwalking to their own deaths...obviously, they had no idea about that later either. I have had dreams that left me exhausted when I awakened...even terrified.

So, is it possible that we go to another plane of existence? Is it possible that we are know somewhere else by our dream identities? Are we actually closer to death when we are dreaming? Does dreaming make our soul come to the surface or do we go to where it lives?

I have had some dreams so real...I was never really sure I was awake.




....this blog is all a dream....when you awake; none of this ever happened...

Friday, July 28, 2006

Born Empty....






Hmmm...well I saw this bumper sticker last night that really provoked a lot of thought. It said, "Born Empty". In fact, the more I tried to dismiss it; the more I thought about it. Even this morning, it's still fresh. Born Empty was once a band name and a great name it is; but the truth of the statement is in question.

Is anything alive — born empty?


I think not...kinda like the air, whether you acknowledge it or not; it's still there and you are still using it. I know we as humans have a predisposition toward constant questions about the mysteries of the universe and its creator/purpose, as well as our own. I know that once you have held your newborn baby in your arms, the realization that "there MUST be something more than just me out there" takes place. Evenmoreso; they seem to come into the world with their own personalities and temperments; so part of it is you; but there is something additional there. Where or what is it coming from? Is there a holding tank of souls or energy waiting to come here?

Well some might argue that really evil people or society's monsters are born empty or become empty.... Even still, really? Something has to be in there. Don't you think? Really? Is there susch a thing as "born empty"?




Hmmm...I think I want to rent the old 1960 version of Night of the Living Dead this weekend...

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Life Lived...The Beautiful NOW!






It would seem that we are all rushing to do this or that and out of time before we got it all done. Sometimes; if not most times, we decide things that we will get done 'one of these days...' All too often, our time and our discipline are on different trains, running in opposite coasts. Someday never quite is today.


I must admit; some of my rewarding moments have sauntered in after getting something accomplished that I had meant to do a long time ago. So I try to do most things that I can — NOW; because tomorrow will bring its own set of issues....at least there will be one less. It really helps to make reasonably small goals that aren't overwhelming so I don't short-circuit myself into depression.


I have had a fantastic week away from it all and almost feel as behind as I do refreshed. It's obvious that some things MUST change and time is of the essence. At the same time, I must remain in a thankful mode to not rob the joy from the journey....besides, it could always be worse. I have a great wife, life, family, friends, church and doggy. I think I will just say "hmmm......"




Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Life, Balance, Love and Stuff: Kindness . . .






My good friend, Joel has some great blogs. This one is one of those keepers. Wisdom never requires a lot of words...just a little truth. This kind of revelation has the power of a "mustard seed" when applied to the soup of life. I know because I have personally experienced it with my own heart and eyes. If you don't believe it — I implore you to try it on some impossible situation. You will be amazed and the story will become a landmark in your life, memory and spirit. Here's his short but explosive blog. I hope it ignites memories, hopes and ideas for the future or at least thankfulness for where you are now.

Life, Balance, Love and Stuff: Kindness . . .




Hmmm....man, that's deep.....that'll save me a fortune on car insurance.....

Monday, July 24, 2006

The funny thing about Monday


What my Head Thinks


Mondays are always one of those "X-factor" days when anything and sometimes everything goes wrong.

Luckily, so far, it is not one of those mondays for me...which means it may be that for you — further translated into my notorius saying " Better you than me..." In a Monday, you can come back to "reality" and realize that you rather not have or that you didn't enjoy being away enuf...[some of you; maybe it was TOO enjoyed and you aren't ready for the return]. Anyway, things that would not typically be a big deal, can turn into giants on a Monday. What strange pixy dust does it posesss? I don't know...but I know that if I can just get my brain around "it cannot be that big or bad, or if it won't matter in a hundred years; so what, life goes on." Of couse, that's harder to do when money is attached to the equation. Speaking of 'money' — why does it change everything? Does it really or just allow us to be ourselves with flair?

Oh well...roll on Monday and let me just wave good-bye; good to see you coming; but SO MUCH better watching you leave.



Hmmm....almost evened out...if only I had one more week of sun.....

The Value of Absence




What is the value of absence? Does it help or hurt? In nothing; something can always be found.




Well I have been out of it for a week; away and doing things necessary. While it was ultra nice being away; I pondered the value of absence and presence. I believe it is equally necessary to step away from life on occassion to appreciate it and take note of its marvelous chaoses. It is SO easy to get caught up in the the situtations and circumstances of the dictatorial everyday mundane...

It is only with pause, distance, "absense" that we can mesh our universes into coexistence or self-pronounced oblivion.




Friday, July 14, 2006

In the Span of a Sip...Warm Realities



I was on, if not ahead, of schedule slightly and thought I would saunter into the local Starbucks and get my courage of the day. Normally, I just get something safe and healthy, china green tips green tea — good for you and your wallet. But it was Friday and it's been a stressful week; so why not dare to do the extra! I ordered my favorite, white chocolate mocha, extra hot. I ONLY get it very seldom; I try not to use up my needs for wants.


Returning to the comfort of my vehicle with the soundtrack from The Red Violin playing, I reached for my first sip. Mmmmmmmmm..............smooth........sweet...........comforting.......reassuring; liquid grace. I reflected on the goodnesses that had accompanied my life up til now; not because I deserved them, but because He is generous.

I drove past the homeless people — remembering that I was no better and could have just as easily been or be one; past the police — glad they exist, but no need to be stopped by them and along the trash-blown road past the mission — glad it helps some folks, more glad I have a home to go to when this day is done.






Then I thought about the thought, "not using up my needs for wants" or was it better stated "not using up my wants for needs." What if I won the lottery, would I do what I say I would do with it if I actually won it? What if I woke up as Jesus, would I resent everybody wanting something from me, but not asking if there was something they could do for me or even a simple thank you? Would I hate being followed, watched and begged every waking moment? I know for me, I don't mind helping people—but I resent the same people who constantly take, take and take as though I owe them or they just believe I am their "windfall"....



I think most people want to help others; sometimes the reality of all their needs and how helpless we are in the face of so much or little — burns our tongues and we turn away....



Hmmm.....

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

I love my Dad






I had an early morning conversation with him just to say hello and hear his voice. It is a voice long and deep embedded in my comfort zone. It is a voice that I derive direction, common sense and peace when I hear it. I guess we always are marked by those early years. Many have asked me "why I didn't do this or that?" and the answer was simple. There was no question that at some point Daddy would be home.... If I heard it once, I heard it a million times from my mother, "Wait 'til your daddy gets home!" He worked most of the time and practically still does.

As a kid, you think that if I am sleep, I will be safe or clear. Or if I tell momma first, then she can tell him easier — none of those mattered for me or any of the other 5 of us. He was very firm with the first 4 and very black and white. If we were working; then we were probably going to be ok...no patience for laziness and no excuses for stealing.

Anyway, I am much older now and still appreciate my raisings that have severely prevented me from getting into most typical troubles. At the sound of his voice, I can regain my comfort and peace and set out for direction again. Some of his most memorable words come back to me often:
...just 'cause the light is green; don't mean go...(what a keeper)
...oil and water are the life of a motor.... (applies to many things)



Hmmm....

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

They Joy in Creating Life






The last couple of days have been spend digging, replanting, and removing trees and shrubs. It is amazing how far down some of the roots go and equally astonishing how shallow some of the roots are that support fairly large plants. Since I suffered from hail damage; it is now time to get the new roof, gutters, windows, siding etc. done; which begs the question, 'what else can be done for "curb appeal"? We have all these new flowers to plant and moved around shrubs and even trees.

The front of our home has a japanese maple that is gorgeous...so some hesitation goes into transplanting it. But at long last, it happened last night. I have to confess; it was not nearly as easy as I thought it would be. Eventually, I had to cut the roots to get the tree free. After digging another hole two feet out from the old one, I replanted and watered the blushing maple.

I have several beautiful plants to put in the ground; but the roofers are coming. I don't think I want to take the chance of losing all my hard work to tar and boots. It is very theraputic to get down in the dirt and dig/scratch, moving large muscle groups while envisioning how a project will turn out by the end. It's kinda like blank paper or canvas before you dare make that first stroke.



Hmm....dirt on my desk? ....flowers, planting, digging—when do I have time for that? No wonder they call me metrosexual.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Where Is Myself?



What sky have I fallen from? What is my true identity? How long must I be here and why?




We all ask those kinds of questions at some point. I don't know of many people who actually "know" the answers to those questions. It makes me think of the Garth Brooks song "The Dance." If we knew it all; we might have missed "the dance."

We are all endowed with appetites for the zest of life. My pastor once said, "What you fail at long enough, you will quit." I think I can bear witness to the truth of that. How do we keep failing and keep trying as though we won't fail again? I don't know; but I try not to stop looking for the answer or ability to be that way. It's easy to give up when the tough gets impossible. When we do a self analysis, we often are bogged down in the "didn't do's" and "should haves" and miss the lesson that those things teach. I try to make my self diagnostic run at least once a month—when all thought and action is put on hold and I submerge below the surface of my humanity to seek what lies beneath. It all leaves such a deep uneasy.

It's great to have quality friends when you are in those situations. They add the air to your wings to help your legs stand. They also tell you when you are full of crap.




Hmmm....where is myself...what kind of question is that? ...more terrifying is the answer....

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Oh the Glorious Rain!


You are so missed...






It's Wednesday...but for all intensive purposes; it's really Monday in costume. It's ok...I had a great long weekend with my sweetie. It was only saddened by my neighbor losing his 29 yr old son to a boating accident. Life deals strange hands.



Hmmm...."What light on yonder window breaks..? It is the east ...."

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Superman Returns...The Jesus Caper; Divinci Recoded



Superman Returns!!! Where has he been? Why did he leave? Why did he come back? Why hasn't anybody figured out he's Clark Kent? Was it really worth making another Superman movie?



YES, on to the hero. Yes, it's been some time since the original alien in tights flew across the screen and into our hearts. Truth, Justice and the American Way....a motto perhaps lost in time; but that's another story. I must confess that I was a bigger Christopher Reeve fan after his accident than while he was in tights. The strength of his character and humanity far out-weighed his super abilities. He will be sorely missed; but remembered in history as a landmark of humanity.


Hopefully out of respect, Hollywood has waited this long to make another Superman movie...not that the last couple were so great. Like most heroes in the DC universe; Superman gets "super"ed to death. By that I mean Superman, Superboy, Supergirl, Superdog, Super etc....like Batman, Batgirl, Batwoman, Bat Shark Repellent etc. Without a doubt, I gravitated toward the Marvel universe; where the words were bigger than my vocabulary and the heroes were more than just an identity behind a mask.


I won't spoil the movie for anyone who has not seen it yet. I MUST say it is the best of films as of late. X-MEN III does not even hold a worthy Marvel-candle to it. As good as Batman Begins; it takes on super human strength from its legacy in Christopher Reeves which it gives noteable homage to and then builds to an inordinate creshendo between good and evil as the good in humanity preserves the super in his legend. The relationships appear realistic and as complicated as real life might be if one had been gone for 5 yrs...people move on; they face the struggle between the memory of what was vs the value of what is—extremely human. Thank God all men and/or women don't trade up! They stick to their guns til the last blazing bullet departs; til the smoke only comforts a cold barrel that has long forgotten the vibrant charge of hot bullets.


Superman's flight was astounding in this movie. I was amazed at his ability to fly so easily and even gently...his tender strength. He had a depth of caring that was soul-touching. I even for a moment thought I was watching the Passion of the Christ....I leave it to you to figue out which part of the movie that happens. Apparently, we secretly cannot get enough of the ultimate hero and ressurection story being retold down through the generations in new and inventive ways.


To the Villian ... Excellent, Kevin Spacey!!! As always, money trumps. The love of it may be the root of all evil; but the root of all victories is Love...even in the comics. Ruthless, smart and well dressed, Lex strolls into our mind's eye as a formidable opponent with technology at his disposal. The best part of the whole story is the NEW concept of growing more land...the one thing we as a society has never made more of or created.


Suffice to say...the movie is excellent! It gets my pinto beans and cornbread vote for a well developed story, great flashbacks, extremely humanistic psychology and real life drama with a cape. It is also worth saying that the movie is NOT junked up with fowl language or sex scenes. Safe for the whole family; although very young may not have the required attention span....it's kinda long. I also hear its in 3-D at the IMAX....I may actually pay all that money to go see it again with those cool glasses on!




Hmmm....pinto beans and cornbread vote! Can I get sweet potatoes and corn with that?